The Wrath of Evan
by Ace335dark
Summary: After the events of PArt 5 Josuke finds himself trapped in a battle for control of the Joestar heritage. Who is Funny Valtine? Who are the 8 Precepts and Who Killed Don Zaloogin?
1. My unfunny valentine

Chapter 1

My Unfunny Valentine

Josufumi Jotaro and Josuke were trapped. Trapped. Completely trapped. Like mice in a cage. "This is all you're fault" screamed Josuke punching Jotaro. Jotaro summoned his star platinum and punched Josuke back. " Calm down you jackasses. Lets find a way out of here" said Josefumi staring at the auburn skylight and crying.

Three Days Ago

Joan Lemon struck the glass with her stand Dirty Loops. "Golly, the glass is destroyed" said Merry-Suto who could not see stand. Jotaro who could see stands said nothing. He didn't want to interupt this lover dispute with confusing imagery. Suddenly a three ton spire shot out of the ground, killing Merry-  
Suto and Joan Lemon. "What the?!" yelled Josuke. Josuke called out Star Platnuim and bunched the spire. The spire didn't budge. How odd. A pistol was shot from the top of the spire. Josuke stopped time and dodged the pistol jumping to the top of the spire through stand jumps. A man with golden hair with scars all over his face and a voice like Speedwagon. "Who the hell are you!" yelled Josuke. "Valentine, Funny Valentine." said the man in a distinct American accent. He shot at Josuke again. Josuke dodged. Josuke had Star Platinum strike Funny Valentine. "WHY DID YOU KILL MERRY-SUTO AND JOAN LEMON!" yelled Josuke. Funny Valentine laughed like a mad god. Star Platinum let out a blast of ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA. Suddenly Josuke heard a pistol from behind him. Josuke turned around. "It seems you haven't heard of the power of my stand, TOWER SONG." A flash of UNUNUNUNUNU and Josuke was out cold. "Now time to die" said Funny Valentine reloading his revolver. This took more work than it should have. "Wait just one second.." said a voice from behind Funny. It was Wekapipo.


	2. Wekapipo the Spiral Ball

Chapter 2

Wekapipo

A ball of spike struck Funny's gun obliterating it. Funny valentine tsked and threw a punch at Wekapipo. Suddenly Josuke came from behind Funny and punched him with Crazy Diamond. Funny dodged the punched and his stand appeared at last.

 **Tower Song**

 **Power: C**

 **Vitality: B**

 **Speed: A**

 **Range: D**

 **Precision** **: A**

 **Development Potential: C**

A 12 armed humanoid made of the most pure and clean of marble appeared. "Crap. You revealed my stands true form." yelled Funny Valentine. Funny took out his bingo book and checked a box in it. "You're Good" he said smiling madly. Then a shot of marble concrete struck from the stands body. Josuke dodged but it yet Crazy Diamond hurting Josuke. "That speed" said Josuke his nose bleeding. Funny then turned Tower Song to Wekapipo. In response Wekapipo summoned his own stand **Childish Gambino.**

 **Childish Gambino**

 **Power: B**

 **Vitality: B**

 **Speed: C**

 **Range: C**

 **Precision: B**

 **Development Potential: E**

A humaoid figure with black red and blue skin and no face appeared next to Weakpipo. The two stand clashed blocking each other hits. Suddenly Tower Song appeared behind Wekapipo."NO" yelled Josuke. But it was too late Wekapipo took a strike form Funnies Tower Song. But then Wekapipo smiled. "You fell into my trap. Reflection." he yelled with all the confidence in the world.

Suddenly Childish gambino turned into a 12 Mirrors. "What a weird power" responded Funny jumping away. Suddenly the mirrors turned into a second version of Tower Song. "Heh you didn't realize my gambit. I knew your stand was weaker than mine from it's strikes on Josuke. And I knew your stand was incredibly fast. So fast it could fake teleportation. And with a stand jump you could copy that deadly speed. But my stand's Reflection Power turned it into an exact copy of your stand minus its powers. Thus." said Wekapipo. Suddenly the Childish Gambino version of Tower Song struck Funny Valentine. "Alright" yelled Josuke as he had his Crazy Diamond join the punching as Funny took immesnse amount of damage. Suddenly a blast of concrete and marble came from Funny. Wekapipo was launched back forcing Childish Gambino to save him. Funny smiled.

Josuke was on the ground Funny Valetine hovering over him on his stand Tower Song. "Why you?" yelled Josuke. "Now Joan Lemon die.". "Wait I'm not Joan Lemon." yelled Josuke confused. "You're not?" said Funny is equal confusion. He looked at his bingo book. "Oh you don't look like her. I'm off." he said. And then he dissipated. "What was that about?" asked Wekapipo. "I don't know" confessed Josuke " He just attacked my out of the blue."


End file.
